Cuckolding, a term often shrouded in mystery and misconceptions, is a dynamic and consensual arrangement between a couple that explores the more risqué sides of sexual exploration and emotion. With a history rooted in taboo fantasies and erotic literature, cuckolding has gained increasing attention in recent years, both in the media and within the realm of relationship dynamics. So come along for the ride as we dive deeper into the world of cuckolding to dispel myths and give you a better understanding of this fantasy and what it could mean for your relationship dynamic.
Cuckolding is a sexual fantasy or fetish that involves one partner deriving pleasure from watching their partner engage in sexual activity with someone else. Traditionally, this fantasy has been more common in hetero couples, with the male partner taking on the role of the ‘cuckold’ and the female partner as the one engaging in sexual encounters with other partners, commonly referred to as ‘bulls’. However, what began as a heterosexual fetish is now increasingly common in the LGBTQ+ community too and has a strong appeal for a variety of reasons.
The appeal of cuckolding varies from person to person, but some common elements include feelings of humiliation, voyeurism (the enjoyment simply from watching something you shouldn’t be – with permission, of course), and comparison. The cuckold often experiences a mix of emotions, such as arousal, jealousy, and excitement, while witnessing their partner with someone else – all of which add to their pleasure.
This dynamic can also involve power exchange and the exploration of dominance and submission.
A cuck is the masculine term for an individual who derives sexual arousal, pleasure, or emotional satisfaction from watching their partner being intimate with someone else. The cuck may be submissive or even humiliated during the session, whereby they’re spoken to in a derogatory manner, made fun of or told they’re unable to satisfy their partner to the same standard.
Alternatively, the cuck might simply enjoy watching their partner having a wail of a time with someone else, no slurs or insults required (or desired!). Not all cucks like to be humiliated, for some, the voyeurism angle is plenty for them to get their kicks.
A cuckquean is the female version of a cuck. A cuckquean finds pleasure or arousal in watching or knowing that her partner is engaging in sexual activities with someone else. Derived from the term ‘cuckold’, which refers to a man in a similar scenario, a cuckquean specifically pertains to women who get sexual pleasure from the feeling of being ‘cuckolded’. As with their male counterparts, sometimes the cuckquean will enjoy humiliation or being forced to perform acts that debase her. In some cuck/cuckquean relationships, the cuckquean may fantasise that their partner impregnates another woman. A cuckquean typically takes on a submissive role in the relationship while her husband or partner is dominant and in control.
Whether you’re reading this for research, out of curiosity, or because it’s something you’re thinking of trying with your partner, it’s important to remember that as with any sexual fantasy or fetish, it’s not for everyone. If it’s something you want to explore with your partner, you need to have open and honest conversations and set boundaries so you can both maximise on the pleasure you’re hoping for.
Cuckolding has many different levels and variations. You need to figure out what it is about the fantasy that excites you. Is it just watching? Is it the idea of getting involved? Do you want the added layer of humiliation? Make sure you work all these things out before you start your cuckolding journey and consider how it could affect your relationship.
Afterwards, both talk about how it felt and whether it’s something you want to do again. Be totally open and honest about what you liked or didn’t like. Good communication is the key to success in a relationship, so don’t be afraid to own your truth and we’re sure you’ll find something that works for you.
Love,
AS X
Guest editor for March @movewithtara is passionate about breaking down taboos and enabling discussions to help us live our best sexual lives.
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