How to Have Mindful Sex

How to have better sex through mindfulness

Sold? Want to know exactly how you can have better sex through mindfulness? Here are our top tips…

We’ve said it once, and we’ll continue saying it forever – communication is the single most important thing when it comes to sex. This is never truer than with mindful sex. Talk to your partner before you get started and discuss what you enjoy and what you want from sex.

Make a habit of being mindful in your day-to-day life. This could be through guided meditation or simply taking time out of your day to unwind. Mindfulness can be helpful in all aspects of life, so put time aside to refocus day-to-day. Practice emptying your mind while focusing on your body, breathing, and physical sensations. Once you’ve made mindfulness a habit, you can then bring this calm, relaxed energy into the bedroom.

Getting to know your body through masturbation allows you to learn and understand exactly what it is you want from your partner during sex. Take the time to fully explore your body and the different sensations you experience. Try teasing different parts of your body and erogenous zones – you might discover something new!

If you’re practising mindful sex, it’s important you pick a quiet time when you won’t be interrupted. A free evening is perfect – you won’t be distracted by other plans, chores, or what’s happening later in the day, and will have the time to focus completely on each other.

Create an ultra-relaxing atmosphere with candles, mood lighting and music. You don’t have to jump straight into sex either – you can start by focusing on each other’s bodies. Try giving each other massages or teasing erogenous zones, really feeling and experiencing each sensation.

You may be surprised to hear this from us but forget about the orgasms for a while! The whole point of mindful sex is to enjoy each and every little moment rather than racing towards that end goal. Thinking too much about orgasming can add unnecessary pressure; instead, allow yourself to enjoy each sensation.

Once you’ve practised mindfulness outside the bedroom, you’ll find it much easier to start bringing it into sex. Empty your mind and don’t allow thoughts to distract you. Explore your partner's body and rediscover what they like and have them do the same for you. Focus on breathing, your body, the rhythm and the sensations you’re feeling in the exact moment – and don’t worry about what’s going to happen next.

If you find yourself getting distracted or still aren’t sure where to start with mindful sex, try using your senses to bring yourself back into the moment and focus on sensation. What can you see, feel, taste or smell? From the texture and warmth of their skin to the noises they make, focus on the things you wouldn’t usually and enjoy every little moment.

Approaching sex through mindfulness can not only lead to greater physical pleasure but a deeper connection and understanding of your partner. Keep it simple, slow down, enjoy each other and have fun!